Gloria and Janey becomes real life

Oh look at me being the worst blogger ever (like this is news to anyone). There have been some new, and potentially scary, developments that just happen to involve my sister and I haven’t had a chance to write jack shit. I don’t want to say too much about that until we have news because I’m worrying about vague possibilities at this point. For now, I’ll just continue on past scary shit involving my sister because there’s a lot of that. She’ll give me a heart attack someday, I swear.

Ok. So. As previously discussed, my sister and I are freaking dorks. I’m worse though. In fact, a large percentage of my friends for the first 15 or so years of my life were friends she made and I knew through her. I’m socially awkwaaaard! As a result, we spent a lot of time together, until she started high school. See, my sister is freaky smart, but school really isn’t her thing. She isn’t a fan of being told what to do and had fairly contentious relationships with a lot of her teachers. She also started drinking around that time. I blame myself for that in a lot of ways, because when I was 14 or 15, I started drinking, so of course my little sister did too. I didn’t expect her to have such an addictive personality, though, and it became a problem for her very quickly.

When my sister was 15, she brought a water bottle full of vodka to school, and drank it in her math class. Let me be very clear – she brought STRAIGHT VODKA to school and drank the ENTIRE bottle. At 7am. She also weighed roughly 90lbs, and the amount of alcohol in her system caused her to pass out. Her friends managed to get her to the bathroom so she could throw up (thank god) and tried to convince her teacher that she just had the flu. Fortunately, her teacher wasn’t a moron and called an ambulance. They pumped her stomach, and her BAC was still .25ish. If she hadn’t thrown up when she did, she very likely would have died. We thought it would be a wakeup call, but it turned out not so much.

Around the same time as the drinking suspension, my sister and I were caught stealing. That’s hands down one of the worst days of my life, and definitely one of the most embarrassing moments. We were both given deferred judgment. I took my theft class, wrote my essay, paid the fines, and never, ever did it again. My sister, on the other hand, got caught stealing diet pills at Safeway the day after Christmas, just weeks after the deferred judgment was finalized. If you take enough of them, you get a decent buzz, I guess. I don’t really know. One of our friends was with her (and was definitely involved) but my sister took the rap and had to do community service at the local VFW, which she spent smoking pot and convincing the veterans to buy her cigarettes.

That spring, my sister went to a friend’s house for lunch, and they drank a beer, I guess. Another student happened to find out, and considering that she hated my sister*, she went straight to the principal. Since it was her second offense, she was expelled from school, and at her court date, the judge ordered her to join AA.

I was finishing my senior year of high school at this point, and while I drove her to her meetings and UAs, I was sort of…disconnected, I guess. I was worried about the very real possibility that I wouldn’t get in to the college of my choice, as well as spending roughly 10-12 hours a day at school between classes, cheerleading, and “improve my college application” clubs, and I don’t remember a whole lot about it. However, I remember that my sister was sober and had completely embraced AA. She started attending an alternative high school and was doing really well. She made new friends, and was generally a more pleasant person to be around.

Aaand then she decided to go back to her old school for senior year, and around the same time decided AA was a cult.

*Actually, a lot of people hated her. Mostly girls. My sister is beautiful, self-confident, and generally a fun person to be around, so of course all the guys wanted to be her friend. Pretty girl with lots of male friends=public enemy number 1 for teenage girls. I never had that problem, strangely enough…